817 Days

Hello everyone, 3 more days and I'm flying to Cape Town. (Flying on the 1st of April) I feel butterflies in my belly, I feel excited and scared. It's a new chapter in my journey. A million of questions are going through my head. And a lot of them are 'what if...' and then I wonder and fantasize ... But nothing is set and stone, I don't know what the future will bring, I don't have this control, in fact nobody does. And that is scary, not knowing what will happen... But nobody knows what's going to happen so I need to learn to hand over my 'wanting to know, wanting to control' and that is not easy but I'm sure once I'm on that plane to Cape Town then I will be able to let go. My wanting to control is strong now because there are 3 more days that are fully planned before I leave and I just want that everything goes smoothly ... I'll get over it hahah

Also I'm having a really hard time saying goodbye to my family, I don't know how to say goodbye atm... Also I'm not gone for a very long time but still it's not easy to say goodbye! Well it's a temporary goodbye because this summer I will be back for some time and then go back to SA.

Maybe some of you are wondering why I am going back to Cape Town?

I can live in Belgium but for now I don't, I own it to myself to give me my year in Cape Town (which I wanted to give myself last year but Covid-19 happend and that is okay!)

Cape Town is where I was reborn, is where I started my journey of recovery, where I learned so many different life lessons and where I want to learn more! Cape Town will always be something very special for me! But what about work? Luckily I am able to work from home (My work is online). That is why I'm taking my work there. I also feel more inspired in Cape Town.

So I have mixed feelings but I know I'm doing the right thing for me. I'm so excited but also scared... I do think this is healthy to feel like this, everything will be okay!

Xoxo

Lot's of love

M_In _Recovery