Sooo it's almost the end of the year 2022... 6 more days to go until we celebrate New Years!
My initial intention is/was to write a blog about 2022 but we will see where I'll end... hihi
I can't even remember how I felt when 2022 started but I do know what I've learned this year! And I don't want this to sound selfish in any way! So here I go!
I will always want to help everyone and make sure they are happy. I try to put their happiness above mine and I try to do well for everyone but that brings me more down and exhausted. Not everything is taken for good and these things can turn against me. This year I loved someone more than I loved myself and I have lost this person. It caused me a lot of pain. And I accepted it and moved on after a painful time. Does it still hurt me? Yes it does. But that means I'm healing. It means that i'm still in touch with my feelings and didn't push them away like I used to do. 2022 taught me that as much as I am wanting to be there for others, they are not always there for me in the way I would want them to be. And I don't mean this in a negative way! People deal with stuff differently then me or others. And that's okay. I'm a very emotional person and an overthinker. I tried to not analyse every single detail te last few weeks but I still do it. My overthinking can bring me so down but also very up. Or okay maybe the last few weeks I can turn it around in the positive way. But okay I'm going to go back to the previous point because I don't want this to come over as something negative! Even when I wanted people to be there in another way for me they were in their own way and at that time I couldn't see that but now I can. It's difficult sometimes to know what to do in situations and that's okay. That's something I learned this year. So thank you to everyone who was there for me in your way!! Sometimes I just also want someone to love and accept me (romantic) but that time will come one day!
So to go back to "putting others happiness above mine" .. let me tell you. IT DOESN'T WORK! You have to love yourself first in order to give to others. You have to stick up for yourself and just be who you are! Not how others want you to be or how you think others want you to be. If someone doesn't like you, their problem not yours! We all have some bad days or weeks but the sun is shining after every one of them, no? I know the sun will be there after some darker times in my life and that is my light. I sometimes don't want to be here in some situations but that's wrong and easy. It will always get better and there is always a solution. Brighter days will always appear, you just have to believe in them! Okay this sounded dark but I don't mean it in the way I want to die, NO! Just disappear for a second so it's all gone and passed but that's not how life works. Life can and is very bright! No doubt about that! Put yourself first and the rest will follow. Love yourself and others will love you. Take care of yourself and life will take care of you! Accept yourself and you will learn to love yourself!
2022 was a very wonderful year with a lot of joy, love and happiness. 2022 taught me a lot. I have amazing friends, I created a home for myself, I worked on myself, my business grew in a different concept, I got a lot of clarity on different situations. I had so much fun this year! It was really amazing! Thank you to everyone for being part of it! Let's make 2023 even greater! Let's have fun and love each other! I'm ready! Are you?
Lot's of love